OV Day

CD17 I just love getting a peak day! It just feels so empowering. Hope the little swimmers don't "fork" it up!

Holy Ovaries Batman!

Wow. I’m feeling those ovaries today! I can feel them when I get up, cough and especially when I sit down. Oh empty happy uterus, please bless us this month with happy ovaries, good stuff and all the fun action!

Positive Friday

CD 12
high reading

Happy Friday All! (or Saturday morning to some of you)

If you are new to my blog, I like to do a Positive Friday post. I am a positive thinking person and believe that if you can be positive you can bring yourself positive things. So to start my weekend off right I like to list a few things that made me happy or I am positive about. Big or small I think its good to remember that there are happy things going on while struggling to get to that really big happy place.

here goes....

1. I am almost at 49 followers. I think its time I do a little giveaway when I hit 50!
2. I’m feeling better and the husband does too. Always nice to get over being sick.
3. I won something from a local radio station earlier on this week. And it’s a good prize - $200 and McDonald coffee drinks for a year! Totally awesome win.
4. I’m learning to coupon and learning anything new is always fun for me. Any suggestions on websites to use or people to follow?
5. I got my haircut last weekend and was really not happy with. Well I called up my awesome hairdresser and she had me come in yesterday to fix it up. Now it looks great and I’m uber happy with it.
6. I'm having hot flashes like crazy! So i'm going to say hooray because hopefully that means Clomid is doing it job.
7. Today was the first day of High on my CBEFM.
8. My sister has had a few really good things happen for her this last week or so - a new scholarship and an internship for this summer. I'm happy and proud of her and glad she got both of these.
9. I am looking forward to a nice quite weekend without a lot of plans
10. I have already found some great new blogs to follow and some of my older ones have gotten their BFPs this week! Congrats to all of them.


Thank you for stopping by and I wish you a lovely weekend. Before you go I encourage you to think of a few good things for yourself and if you feel like it have your own Positive post or just tell me a thing or two your happy about.

Dreaming

CD11

I had a dream the other day about taking POAS and got like five positive tests. I have had these types of dreams before but this one was very clear and seemed more "real". It was nice to wake up thinking about it and how this will be us one day. We will get there.

My attitude lately has also been a little different. The things that normally get to me still do but the feelings seem to be more fleeting and sting less. I know this will probably not last but for now I like the better attitude.

Just Moving Along

CD 9

Last week was a busy one! Thursday was a pretty full day at work and it kept me busy on Friday too. I missed my positive Friday post (oops) but I hope everyone had a lovely weekend and had some positivity. I also want to send out a quick congrats to Elphaba for getting her BFPositive! Oh and I just saw AP got her's too!.

If your visiting for the first time (hello to all ICLW visitors!) our story is in a year in the making and we're doing all we can. We found out last year we had male infertility issues and we are waiting to see if the corrective surgery helped. For more details I have a time line over to the side with links -------------------->

Today I am home sick and feeling pretty yucky. I started feeling a bit off last week and it settled in over the weekend. I missed work yesterday as well and hopefully I can get back on the go tomorrow. So I am going to keep this one short and try and get some rest.

What a Wee Great Day

This is my favorite holiday. Hands down.

Instead of going to bed I am currently up watching QVC (a home shopping TV channel) that does a 24 hour all Irish day. They have true Irish items and the people that made them on as well as some music and so many freaking items I want to buy! I will try to refrain from buying anything and instead just enjoy listening to them talk.

Today is also the hubby and I's "Us" Day. We got engaged on St. Patrick's Day and since our anniversary is in February we skip Valentines today and instead celebrate today. So tonight we'll go out to dinner and have a nice little time together.

If you are a bit down and out this month, go get a green beer or two and forget the worries you have at least just for today. If you are wishing and hoping I hope you get a little extra Irish luck this cycle!

So I will leave you with this -

May your blessings outnumber
The Shamrocks that grow
And may trouble avoid you
Wherever you go.

Wordless Wednesday

(sadly this is the best I have to offer today, but it makes me laugh)

Oh and I won a signature from Cutesie Blog Degisn playing a comment game the order day

and here it is.....

Lets Try This Again

CD 2(ish)

Well the weekend did not produce a positive result. It was not a bad one, it just didn't include all that I was hoping for. I started spotting on Sunday and AF finally kicked in full gear today. But such is life when you're living it in cycles.

I decided this last month that I wanted to give it another try with Clomid and blindly have faith that the hubby's "stuff" is better. It honestly surprises me to know how desperate I was last year to find out what was wrong and now I am in a place of fear to know the truth and holding on to just hope instead.

So on Monday I called my Dr's office and asked to speak to a nurse about trying Clomid again. They never called me back but instead called in a RX to the pharmacy. Not only did they call it in without telling me but they called it in for 10MG and two refills.

So here we go again!

According to the American Society for Reproductive Medicine, up to 45 percent of women receiving Clomid will become pregnant after six cycles.

I also have a friend that has a "color sense" and said she saw a really good white light color when I mentioned taking Clomid. And I'll take all the good signs I can get!

Now I'll calling upon the nice peeps that do statistics and good lights to kindly ask that you consider me for the good side of things this go around.....

What if

Do you ever wonder - what if....

What if the surgery did not work?
What if he needs another one?
What if its time to see an RE?
Will we have the money for that?
Can we prepare ourselves to not focus on saving money but spending it on tests and procedures?
What if we do and it doesn't work?

What if our only option is adoption?
Will we even be eligible?
Will we have to move and have a better house?
Will we have to make more money?
What if we just get denied?

What if this never happens for us?
Will I be able to see others with children and not feel depressed?
Will I really be OK with a life that does not include children?
Would it affect my attitude on life?
Would it affect our marriage?
Will the world just stop?
Will there be joy in things?


What do you do when your one dream in life seems unreachable?

And into the Weekend

CD 30 - 10 DPO

Well folks it is indeed Friday again and I'm not complaining! I have done a lot better this week with catching up on your blogs and am so glad to see some of you are making progress and others are trying to be positive about things. I really truly believe being positive will get you further.

So with that said, here are few positives to start the weekend off right -

1. Someone (and I have no idea who) got my Starbucks this morning and left it at my desk. I came in to work to have a lovely treat.

2. I got a new Wii game I plan to play the heck out of this weekend :) - Epic Mickey

3. I got to spend sometime this week planning a work potluck for St. Patrick's Day. Sometimes I really wonder why I never ending up being a party planner....maybe one day.....

4. Next week we will have St. Patrick's Day! This is by far my most favorite holiday. I know it is silly but I love absolutely everything Irish. I have been listening to Irish audio books for weeks now.

5. We got invited to a hockey game next week so I'm excited about that too.

6. Tomorrow night is girls night out with some pretty awesome co-workers. We will be doing painting with a twist. Its pretty much a painting class that you can bring wine. Unless AF decides to show up I'll be a sober gal.

7. I have had some great music to listen to this week. I just got in a grove and listed to the same three guys over and over.

8. My ipod is on its last leg so I finally broke down and got a new one on Ebay. Now I'll get to listen to that awesome music on the new one very soon.

9 . If there are not signs of AF I plan to test on Sunday. Wish me luck!

10. And last but certainly not least - I feel like a very lucky girl. My family is safe, my home is safe and we are not experiencing any bad mother-nature issues today. My heart goes out to yet another country dealing with water and land issues. I know there will be a lot of time, money and care needed to help put Japan back together and to help those families who are dealing with losses. My heart goes out to all of them and anyone here that has loved ones in that area.

I hope you will have a few good thoughts for today and please feel free to share them here with me! Take care and have a lovely weekend!

Randoms

CD29, 9DPO

I think today will just be a collection of random….

I have been pretty irritable lately. Normally this kicks in a day or two before AF shows up but I’ve been back and forth the last few days with having a snippy attitude. I think someone of it is work related. I have a desire to do more and right now I am bored out of my mind. I have literally begged for more work, more customers or to be added to projects and so far nothing has come of it. I feel like I am wasting everyone’s time by not being productive. I cried a bit to the hubby last night about it and how I hate that I care too much.

A girl I went to high-school with is due this month and my jealousy bug has gone nuts. I try not to judge people but this girl is in a bad marriage, has no money, a family that does not help and is not even sure where they will stay once she has the baby. I can not help that I have these feelings of anger and rage that someone that can not give a baby a good home will be taking one home soon and we are just waiting with empty arms.

Despite my odd moods I have got to spend some time with quite a few great people this week. A few ladies I use to work with and miss dearly (Hi T), a few of my bookclub girls and dinner with one of my bestie’s and her husband. I have had some tasty food and good conversations this week.

The hubby turned to me the other day and said – “You know I wish you would hurry up and get knocked up…so I can have this drink.” In the moment it was not as bad as it sounds here. We were kidding around and talking about things and the drink he was referring to was a moonshine his dad gave him. He took a little sip to try it and decided to put it away as a celebration drink. Considering his attitude when we first stared TTC I think this is great.

I’ve had odd twings on my right side the last few days.

Wordless Wednesday

"Letting Go" by Nathan Spoor

Just fits for today.

I'm letting go of stress and trying to camly wait in the breeze for this 2WW to pass.

It's Positive Friday Time

CD23, 3DPO

Another Friday, another week over! Time to go home and get the party on…well not really but I am excited for the weekend.

Here are my reasons why -

1. We got some goats. They are two little billies (boys) and are fainting goats. We have decided to name the black one Batman but we are not yet sure on the white one yet. (originally we through Robin but it just doesn’t fit) Name suggestions are welcome! So now we are excited to go home and hang out with them.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQ-evIW6_0U

2. My sister had a surgery today for endometriosis and everything went fine. They said it was mild if any at all.

3. At work today this link got passed around – (here). We were all rolling in our cubes and most of us were crying with laughter. (fair warning, some of it is unintentionally crude)

4. It is going to rain tomorrow so my hubby and I have a scheduled lazy day. I hoping to get in quite a few episodes of Sons of Anarchy.

5. There is a chance the hubby might take me out to a movie tomorrow too. I really want to see Unknown.

6. My sister’s birthday is today so I get to bake a cake this weekend for her. I am trying to improve my baking skills and it is pretty fun for me to do so.

7. I am a big Internez shopper. Much more than I should be but I can’t help myself. Today I got a great deal using Ebates . Each day they have double points for one website and today it was 51%! That’s absurd but good for me. If you ever buy online I would suggest checking it out!

8. Now that winter is coming to an end and my big coat is not needed most days, I got to switch out my purse for a more spring looking one. Silly as it is I love breaking out a new purse.

Now before you go, please think of at least one positive thing. Start your weekend off right with a smile and find joy in something. Please comment here and tell me if you feel like sharing.

Moving Right Along

CD21, 2 DPO

Things are moving along. I am glad to feel like we are back on track but I also feel a bit boring.

This week at work has picked up and I am so grateful for it. I hope to say just as busy as a bee during this 2WW. My last few cycles have not been consistent time wise and are starting to creep back up in length (i.e. OV on CD 20!). So I think I have decided to call my doc this month and see if we can give Clomid another try. Right now I am blindly holding out hope that the hubby's surgery worked and our odds are greater.

The only other update from this week was a rejection letter. Back when we first started trying I signed up for a healthy pregnancy study. If you were TTC or less than 9 weeks along you could sign up. For the first few months I filled out an online form everyday with about 10 questions about medicines or symptoms or in general how I was feeling. After three months with no results I was moved to no survey but each month they sent me a free test strip. Well the other day I got a rejection letter. It was very nice and pretty much said that I was no longer enrolled in the study and could come back later on if I got knocked up. I knew I was out but the letter kind of stung a bit.

I have moved on and am trying to be positive. Once of these days my belief that Positivity leads to Positives will pan out. Here's to hoping it is this month!

Wordless Wednesday

CD 20, 1DPO

The 2WW has begun...

Is this not just a really cool cake?

To pass the time during the next week or so I hope to come across fun happy blogs and things to laugh at. Starting here.....check out today's Cake Wreak on how how babies are made. (make sure you read the captions - they are why the website is so funny)