Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Why Us? (the million dollar quesiton)

This pain, stress, tears, anger, agony....why us?

Did you know that Sperm takes three months to produce and mature and there is often a 4-6 month delay between treatment of the man and resulting changes in the sperm. -
Are you kidding me? REALLY? We have answer and right now I can hope for results in another 6 months?!?

Over 50% of men will have a treatable cause of male factor infertility - is this a silver lining?

Most infertility cases (85% to 90%) are treated with conventional medical therapies such as medication or surgery. - will this be us? if so, will the medical therapy be too expensive?

Approximately 15% of couples attempting their first pregnancy meet with failure.
Why us?
Why anyone?


  1. Oh Lindsay... So much I want to say to you.

    It isn't a million dollar question. Honest to goodness, it isn't. Some people get cancer. Some people get killed in car accident. Some people suffer from infertility. Sometimes it is because of something stupid they've done e.g. drugs etc. but often it isn't. It is luck of the draw.

    You know my story. Unexplained infertility aka "We don't know enough right now to tell you why you're having trouble so let's just bash it with Clomid because that is what we do". I know where you are at so the above isn't said as lightly as it seems.

    I've said it so many times before but there really is nothing just, fair or logical about the distribution of fertility. You've been lumped your serve... it is up to you how you want to deal with that.

    Your numbers aren't the worst out there. Your husband also doesn't azospermia. You aren't being told there is no way this will ever happen for you unless you adopt of use donor material. But... you may need help.

    The thing that I have learned about all the statistical bulls**t it that it is seriously not even worth worrying about "what if" when it comes to things not working out. You may end up being one of the unfortunately minority but you have SO FAR to go before you really need to be even considering it very seriously. Oddly enough, the odds are in your favour and more positive about this journey that you can be.. the better it is going to be.

    I'm not saying leap out of bed every day and sing "The Hills are Alive" but what I am saying is that you do need to try and find peace with this information and focus on getting through one little step at a time and shoot for gold every time.

    It is so easy to get COMPLETELY consumed and destroyed by this thing. Been there, done that... so many of your fellow bloggers have... Reality is that no matter how we try and deny it, this negative merry go round puts stress on the body and doesn't do anyone any favours.

    You are actually about to embark on a new adventure. From now on, when you TTC, you will be doing so with a special formula that is designed with your needs in mind. No longer will you try and fit a square peg in a round hole just because society likes a one size fits all. Bring on that square hole I say! It is time to start cooking with gas!

    Chin up girl. One step at a time. Yes, it is a b!tch but believe me... it will be worth every darn bit of it in the end.


  2. GS - I really do appropriate your comments and advice. Always have. I know I will feel better soon, hopefully next week when we go to the doc.
    I know we have it better than others and I plan to think positively about this soon. I also have a fantastic husband that is being very positive and helpful right now.
    I think I'm just trying to rush through my little pity party and get to more logical thinking. I hope I can cry it out this weekend and move on.

  3. I've asked that same questions many times and now I look back and wouldn't change anything since if I did I wouldn't have the family I have today! I do believe that everything happens for a just may not seem apparent right now. I just added your link! *Hugs!* Happy ICLW! (#72 & 106)

  4. *BIG BIG hugs*

    Take whatever time you need. I spend a great deal of time harping on about the brighter side and more positive aspects... but mostly to make sure that you are getting another persepctive in amongst the rough... cause I know I could have done with it a bit more when I was there. As much as it is important to find your peace etc. also remember that you are entitled to grieve your situation. It is actually really important in achieving the balance. Please don't feel the need to rush it... just do your best not to get lost in it is what I am trying to say.


  5. Hugs can't be easy. Take your time to get through this emotional bump in the road then you can start the focus on the where to nexts of this journey. Good luck...I really hope its just an easy fix for you guys. Sending lots of positive vibes across the ocean to you!